What’s underneath my story? Everything. My current story is a journey to my true self, my heart. At the center of that journey are layers of truth, emotion, learning, unlearning, laughter, heartbreak, heartache, healing, and discovery. So many pieces; moving pieces, buried pieces, developing pieces to make peace (p.e.a.c.e.) with those that didn’t know how to value the open, curious, bold, exploring, emotional, excitable, precious, malleable soul that chose them.
To continue developing peace, love and grace for my true self, my heart, my original soul. A soul that remained constant to its openness, it’s curiosity, it’s boldness, it’s exploration, it’s emotionality, it’s excitability, it’s preciousness and it’s malleability; protected behind/underneath the bunker against the abuse, neglect, rage, indifference, the learned self-neglect, self-hatred, the drugs, the alcohol, the depression, the emotional scar tissue of trying to use my body to find love only to encounter rejection.
What’s underneath the story is a growing confidence, a gathering strength, a rising knowledge and inner wisdom that bursts through the story to guide its direction, shine it’s light, hopefully, a healing light for myself and others. The key for me is not to become trapped in what’s underneath the story because while it is an important part of the process, it is not all of it. Writing my story brings me an awareness of my many truths that mutate from the past to present. In telling stories of my past, I’m able to see the truth of what was because I’ve learned a different truth in the present. It gives me hope that I will continue transmuting to greater truths, better stories, brighter tomorrows. This and so much more is what’s underneath the story, my story anyway.